Drastic Measures
God,I just wanna admit and proclaim that You are bigger and greater than all the problems and burdens I'm carrying on my back. You are more powerful and more important in my life than those stupid problems that I had been magnifying.
But from today onwards, I want to magnify You and I am gonna ignore all of those problems, teach me how to walk by faith, and not to be blinded by the limited future that is overwhelming me. God I pray that Your mercy be revealed. Teach me how to guard my heart and give me a discerning heart to be able to see Your will and Your mighty and full plan for me, because I know the life I am walking isn't the life You want me to lead. Wash me clean again and teach me Your ways again.
I want to love You, not myself.
Take the throne, oh Jesus, my King.
Amen.
The Prophecy
'Imagine yourself walking upon the street, staring upon the sky when you walk towards your dance school for dance class. When you reached the class, you said hi to the many friends that you've made in your journey as God's dancer. One day, a guy came up and asked you; 'Hey man, I like the way you dance, how did you dance like that? And on a side note, I noticed that when you dance I always see you looking at the sky.' And you replied, 'Because I dance for the One that I love, the One that lives above the sky.'
'And the next thing you know, you invited that particular friend for service, and he lives as a servant for Christ, a dancer of Christ from that day onwards. The fun didn't stop there. That friend brought along his own dancer mates into service, and they all converted! You find yourself leading a group of dancers, and you guys interact using dance moves. '
'That's for you, believe it.'
This was what my leader saw in vision making, and he saw me in this picture in CG, lead by the Holy Spirit to prophesy over me. Initially I thought of this that was impossible, that how could I get that great in dance to attract that much attention; and how the heck am I able to lead a group of talented dancers?
Well I failed to look at the big picture. Pastor was saying something about the book of Nehemiah and the ignition words she said was '10 years'. And I thought of it, 'yea, now of course cannot la, but 5 years later sure can!'. Yes! I can see myself in this vision! And I was happy to see that God indeed has a plan to prosper me, more importantly I can see him affirming my decision in dancing for him because I find myself absolutely talent-less in dance but I guess abilities don't matter to him at all. All that matters to him is your faith in him.
King David didn't care about how many soldiers there are on his side, the winning key was God's presence with him. Apart from him, David know he could do nothing. Apart from him, I know I can do nothing after all.
God,
I thank you for your prophetic word. You know I long for Your affirmation and You have gave me just that, that what I am doing now is something that You want me to do, not because of my own wants. I just pray that You will continue to supply the strength and provisions I need in this battle we are all fighting, I pray that You will protect everyone of my comrades, give them the strength to fight on and do what's correct and pleasing in Your eyes. We know that we will still fail you even if we try our best, but we will work towards Your kingdom's cause, because we are no longer slaves to sin - we are now slaves, sold to righteousness, to toil endlessly and willingly for Your kingdom's cause. Let our fire burn strong and our river flows powerfully, and keep us going when we fall down. Amen.
The Shield
If,
as a man,
you fail to protect what you want to protect,
and the cause is because of your own ignorance,
you will learn to feel what I am exactly feeling right now.
The king's shield became his sword,
and what once was meant to be protected became endangered.
A mortem dance with the Enemy,
thinking that he was a friend.
When the chariots were all gone,
what the king learnt was,
that the shield that you meant for defence,
can be doubled as the edge of a sword as well.
just being random..
You will never know how important something/someone is unless you lose it.
Point taken.
I feel like a cornered beast right now.
But I hate it..
I guess you wasn't that ultimate girl that I have coveted so long after all.
Too different had my tastes changed and I guess that your spell finally broke it's control over me - - -
But I hate it.......
Then I remembered,
reading the bible;
attending church;
and being an officer in a christian club;
that isn't what it takes to be a christian.
It's all about a relationship with Him,
but why,
do you lower yourself like that?
Why do you say stuff like that,
why do you say stuff like you have zero dignity,
and make yourself sound so loose?!
I DON'T EVER THINK THAT BEST FRIENDS CAN HOLD HANDS
and there you are saying that it's hot.
And it's exactly 'christians' like you that degrades the name of Christ..
I know I had let you go, but even so, it hurts me when I see you talk like this.
And I hate it.
